We Miss You. God Damn Son of a Bitch Bastard Shithead

And we love that you're with Tommy and your parents. Tom Poston is just out of frame. One thing- some of the neighbors HAVE mentioned your language.

A Sample: This Month in the HOLLYWOOD TRAINWRECK 2009 Calendar

Hurry up and order!!!! Extremely limited supply.

This is always a pretty dark day

For hard-scrabble Eliazbeth Short, that is, and for her memory.
and a brief note to anonymous, who, first, thank you for leaving a comment. I appreciate it. and I mean the smart anonymous, not YOU, Captain Brown. Pour yourself and Donna another drink and sit down. Listen, I'm not saying that Donald Wolfe is telling the truth, none of us know the truth about any of this, regrettably. The plethora of that which has been written about the circumstances of her death most likely will obscure that which actually happened to this sad nut. Of all the materials I've read on the subject, he certainly has made up the most wildly conspiratorial stories with great flair. He's a good story teller; in no way am I saying that he isn't making all of this up.

Not such a hot day for Peter Finch

Thirty-one years ago today. as he walked across the lobby of the Beverly Hills Hotel, he dropped dead on the floor. I'm busy, wiki him.

It all turned to shit Fifty-one and Forty-seven years ago today

We lost Jesse Lasky, the founder of Paramount Pictures, on this date in 1958.

Also lost forty-seven years ago this date was innovative genius Ernie Kovacs. At one point he was very friendly with Hamouflage and Piggy Gugenham, who as you know are neighbors here at the Garden.

It all caught up with him (and turned to shit) Twenty-two years ago today

The photo below was taken at a recent party. Arthur, with his wife, Patricia Lake, Johnny Weissmuller and his wife Beryl Smith, Clifton, and Spoogy Horowitz on far right. Arthur was sufficiently shit-faced to shag Pigtails bows and adorn one himself and the other on Beryl. Pigtails was pissed and stopmed off.
As for it all catching up with him, I'm speaking of Arthur Lake, I remember him as playing Dagwood Bumstead in the "Blondie" movie series. Over champagne french toast this morning in Natalie Schaefer's villa (Mother is having "only liquids"), I was aghast to be reminded of this, from Donald Wolfe's excellent book "The Black Dahlia Files":
and from John Gilmore's book "Laid Bare"

and this is about seven years before he died at the 1980 premiere of Neil Simon's Seems Like Old Times:Natalie Schaefer looked at Cobina, then me and said, "seems like old times". Yeeesh.

It all turned to shit today

For actress/housekeeper/Marie Dressler wanna be Reta Shaw, who passes this date in 1983. This is boring so once it loads head to the 3 minute mark, Reta shows up soon thereafter
Also we lost thesp Pat Buttram on this date in 1994.Perhaps you need a refresher:

It all turned to shit seven years ago

For Avery Schreiber that is, who passed on this date. Here is some of his early work with partner Jack Burns and some of his brilliant work from Match Game 75:truly a great amongst greats, especially here

Hey, pour yourself a drink a watch this; Avery is in here somewhere. feel free to fast forward, but you'll get itThat is her first husband Michael Brandon.

you will find this riveting:
And this, this is just horrific

Another friend of Cobina needs to leave a mark in the forecourt of her villa

They always want to sign the magenta squares first:What, you don't know who Edward Arnold is?Are you good?

Pigtails never misses a chance to pass out

Yes, Pigtails and Adolph Zukor were partying out by the pool, Zuke left Pigtails just laying there

Also, Aunt Doris mentioned that you should see this

And I don't even officially start until tomorow morning

Man, this guy doesn't miss a beat

Today is Billy Haines' Birthday!!!

Oddly, no photos available of the gentleman. Suffice to say that he is our hero.
Happy 109th, and Happy New Year to you and yours!

Pigtails asked Mr Hughes to pay me a box of cash, a pack of Tareytons and a bottle of Drambuie as an advance for my January salary. Howard's crazy, he had that in his trunk.

It all turned to shit Twenty six years ago today

For Victor Buono, that is, for sure. I'm busy, wiki him. Wait, watch this:and you've probably seen this but you never tire of this crap:

May all your dreams come true this Christmas

Having love in your life is a pretty great thing. We are awfully glad for what we've got.
Happy Holidays to you and yours.

Love,

Cliff, Rusty, Poppers, Rage, Pigtails, and Cobina

Maybe you've noticed

But things are starting to look "nicer"I seldom let you see my (winter) office

It's Gary Morton's Birthday!!!!

There you go, she loves the man

Today is Brad Pitt and Steven Spielberg's Birthdays!!!!

Regrettably I could not find any photos of either gentlemen- it's not easy finding photos of them online, believe you me, so anyway I took this picture of Pigtails passed out in the forecourt of Mother's villa. There's going to be more pictures like this in the 2009 Hollywood Trainwreck Calendar. More details on that this weekend!

Anyway, Mr. Spielberg celebrates his 62nd today, as Brad turns 45.

One of Cobina's Holiday Gifts

We thought we should have a few more portraits around the house. Pigtails even took off his trademark bows!

Please take a minute to browse

Cobina's new site, Cobina Cugat Vintage Goods. One of a kind vintage items, many of them not even stolen!

Today Pigtails Let Us Into His Part of the Villa

There's this small sunroom which is always nice on a chilly day

Pigtails n me went to Pickfair for cocktails

and you know that lasts about sixteen hours

It all turned to shit because of cigarettes

First there was Talullah's emphysema-related death, Forty years ago today
And then Jack Cassidy's dropped ciggy on a couch death by immolation in 1976

It All Turned to Shit- Only One Year Ago Today

One of the iconic talent agents of all time, Freddie Fields, aka Ephraim Feldman, died on this date last year. Poor man, he is STILL being yelled at by former client Judy Garland.

We're Letting The Cat Out of the Bag

And we're not talking about Cobina! Going on sale in about a week.You'll see lots of your favorite stars!!!!

Pigtails wants you to see this episode of "Masterpiece Theatre"

It All Turned to Shit Thirty-Six years ago Today

Lolly Pop, dead

Speaking of leaving things out for people to see

I practically stapled this to Cobina's foreheadNow she will quit asking to come to Desilu

Yes this is a repost of sorts

Aunt Doris and Rusty and me ask those of you who liked it the first time to watch this other version which features

Margo Sappington is Miss Baransky
Baayork Lee is Miss Wong
Donna McKechnie is Miss Dela Hoya do nothing but keep your eyes on Donna McKecnhnie, it is a freaky experience, seriouslyand c'mon it cheers me up every time

Today is Max Baer's birthday!!!

Yes, Jethrine Beaudine (also occasionally known as Jethro Beaudine) was born on this date in 1937.

This date also marks the forty-first anniversary of the passing of Bert Lahr aka Irving Lahrheim. Here is an obscure photo of him from some unidentified movie:

It all turned to shit Twenty-two years ago today

For "Dead-y" Arnaz, at least. Don't even ask how this is going to affect my "job".

Jane calling from Schwab's

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No wonder the economy is in the shitter

We always start Thanksgiving Day with This

Well,this and DrambuieChristmas is just four weeks away- there's lots wrong with the world, but at least we have each other to weather the storm. (For greatest enjoyment of this, hit the fullscreen option next to the volume on the Youtube controls)

Mother is all dressed up

We are having a smallish Thanksgiving celebration, but it does begin tonight, the night before. Mother is hosting a dinner for us, Mr. Benchley, Howard Hughes and Pigtails. I am planning on touching not only Howard's plate and food but Howard just to see him freak out. Mr Benchley is the only one certain not to be an overnight guest.

Today is Rich Little's Birthday!!!

I am very excited to see him recreate his stage role in the upcoming "An Early Frost"

Today is Boris Karloff's birthday!!

Dermabrasion really is a bitch

Cobina left these out so you'd see them

Mother went to Mass and has left out these oh so convincing photos of her luxurious accomodations during her spa visit. An aside- another "guest" at the "spa" was the star of the recently cancelled long running CW show "Oh, Pigtails!!!", the show with the precocious talking two year old female Basset Hound, Pigtails. It's kind of tough on Pigtails aka Frank as he in truth is a little boy dog and his littermate/agent (Josh Marmelstein of Aggressive Artists) has told him he's never going to work again. He too has spent the last five months at the "spa". Pigtails and Cobina have struck an odd alliance, as if that isn't already redundant.Pigtails and the employed boy starring as a girl, Lassie aka Laddie.
Electroshock just off to the right
Before she brings him home, can someone at least make sure that Pigtails is a dog?

Jane calling from Schwab's

Shocker: problemo with the order.
Jane is going to be hocking Cobina's vintage jewelry online to pay off her enormous Schwab's tab. Check out her in the lower right column as you scroll down. Drambuie doesn't grow on trees. Or maybe it does, ask Mr. Benchley or Frank Rose.
.

It all turned to shit twenty-eight years ago today

See, my godmother Miss LeRoux knew Frank and Jilly and Sam and JFK; you know, the same ones Cobina "knew"; somewhere along the way the guys heard that Mae was really a dude, I'm just telling you what I've heard Cobina heard. Regardless of what was underneath, Mae was great for business.
from "Go West Young Man"

A little sister honky tonk

and Myra, just as a capper

It's Goldie Hawn and Marlo Thomas' birthdays!!!!

Yes folks, the Laugh-In cutie is a sprightly sixty three today, whereas "That Girl" clocks in at seventy-one. This was the only photo I could find of them together.

Today is Kaye Ballard's birthday!!

Their 60's hit, THE MOTHERS IN LAW- see if you think it is a wee bit like Lucy and Ethel schtick


maybe a little Cinderella with Kaye and Alice Ghostley

It All Turned to Shit Eighty Four Years Ago Today

Well, for a lot of people, but let us start with Thomas Harper Ince: The Chief was throwing a birthday party for Mr Ince on his boat "the Oneida". Lore has it that Marion had disappeared underdeck with perhaps Mr Chaplin for horizontal mambo-ing. The Chief, a jealous sort, went and got his gun and starting firing wildly and allegedly shot Ince in the process.

Such was the power of the Hearst press that the incident was spun very differently: Ince was overtaken with severe stomach cramps and was taken off the boat and driven home where he died. 'Course the fact that the chief had his body taken from the boat to the crematory sort of obviates that possibility. Ask Louella or ask Mother to ask Louella for you.